THE KINDER OLYMPICS
I've been a bit lax with the medievaling recently. In fact, I've been so lax with English as a whole I find myself inventing new words - like "medievaling." I've been covorting with medievalists recently too to try and get myself on the straight-and-narrow, but even that seems to decrease my acadmic prowess. When I meet The Rich the evening usually gives the false outward appearance befitting of - as Rich is - an eloquent anglo-saxonist who offers the UCC English department with a bit of Oxford Alumni decorum. Yet there is no medieval muscles being flexed, only the biscep and tricep exercise that comes from the flow of Rich's austere taste in wine. An austere taste utterly lost on me i might add, who has the open-mouth-instert-here attitude towards any variety of alcohol - though I AM learning. About the only thing I am learning in Richard's company. His Oxford-alumni penchant for chess is also has attempted to culture me; though Rich - being legally blind - has a bizarre shaped chess set that have nipples on them. Which at six in the morning after a night of wine-tasting I find mildly exciting. Don't ask me how but I found it difficult to decipher between the King and Queen though, which probably explains my problems with women, too.

The Beacon is the other medievalist I have acquinted myself with in an attempt to inject a bit of lift into my flaccid medievaling whip. We had made earnest plans to meet and devise a studying schedule to get us both to actually work a bit. However we applied out academic inventiveness to devising a 'Sweetie Olympics' yesterday. Now, we haven't patented this idea yet so I'm trusting yous all to give us credit for this. Sarah won the Revels event, and I won the skittles. What you do is this: in the Revels event you have to pickm one out, and then judge its flavour. In the skittles even you must pull out one and put it in your opponent's hand: they must then chew and guess the colour.
Of course this is just the tip of the Fox's glacier mint. We din't even partake of the Smarties or fruit pastilles event. I'm still fighting to get the "Walkers-Tayto Challenge" recognised as a sweetie-olympic sport, and the exact rules of th M&M event have yet to be finalised. To train ourselves into the sweetie Olympics, The Beacon also bought me this haddock-cloured cola bar which had a small cartoon dog on the back with the following description: "Coola the dog: Full of bright ideas some of which are sensible. He's not convinced the kids take him seriously enough."
What the fook? Answers on a postcard to 28 monastery Hill please. I think I'll scan it and send it into www.Engrish.com.
As for sweetie training I'm not sure I'm able for it, I woke up this morning with a skittles hangover, after intaking enough E numbers to fill a comic book where someone falls off a cliff and says "aieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" in every frame. Ow! I can't even eat for Ireland. Now the Bullshit Olympics, I'd have a fair chance there.